inmyownvoice's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- He Emailed Me!
I am playing dominoes on the computer. Why did the computer make me draw all of the dominoes in the bone yard? This has nothing to do with this entry. I just felt it. Here's The Reason for this Entry... D finally emailed me. I am glad. I have emailed him three or four times and he hasn't returned any of my emails. My heart did a flip when I saw that he had emailed me. (Maybe I'm Not) Over Him Here's the explanation behind D. D is ten years younger than me. I would have to be difficult and decide to like someone that much younger than me. He is a guy from my church. My pastor and single's ministry director is quite adamant about younger men - older women relationships. So, it would probably be a real struggle if we decided to date. A number of other people in my life have told me to go for it, but I haven't. I make myself not think about him. It hurts to know that you have feelings for someone and you can't do anything about it. I am too old for this. Here are some poems I wrote about/for him. The poem mentioned above was not written about/for him. I wrote it about someone else, but the poem fit D, so I put it here. He had been asking me to email him for the last two weeks. I had lept putting it off because I knew that it would cause me to feel emotions that I am trying to surpress. Well, all day I am going to be feeling weird because of all of this. I am tearing up as I am writing this. I might have to put my name on the prayer list today. I can never do anything like a normal person. Abnormality is normal in the Madkins' family. I am feeling too much emotion to finish this. I will try again later. I didn't mean to go into all of this, but D finally emailed me. 8:01 a.m. - 2002-10-03 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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